Falling. It's that feeling of starting a project. Reading through a brief. Details half sinking in amidst a rush of both fear and fancy. Suddenly a flow of ideas starts gushing out and there's a scramble of hands - always too small - cupped to try and catch something of worth. I started my last major textile design research project a while back now. Yet for the first time delayed the writing. It seems a mistake to rush in with the words, when I'm barely sure of the meaning behind them. Waiting, and the time for reflection it brings, allows clarity to form. Well, sometimes.
If not clarity, confidence, has returned to my work. The tumble of ideas and creative production appears to be working towards something. Process is everything, yet the process needs to be valued for it to be of any value. That sounds an obvious sentence but my neurotic tendencies fuel a fierce battle between patience and efficiency.
So how do I plan to force myself to be patient and efficient in this project, yet also get out of the words long enough to produce something physical? Well, make the process the project. Then it's all I have to focus on. Simple, right?
An extract from a memory of a memory (working project title) design intent's closing statement, strengthens the importance and influence of weave as a progressive process...
"In the process of making weave a contemporary craft, it doesn’t necessarily mean the outcome needs to be woven but the outcome is not to exist without the weave in the first place. a memory of a memory see’s weave become a integral part of the design process.
Like a memory of a memory, its influence lingers."
All these words may be empty letters, until the project is complete. Telling myself stories and meanings until I believe them enough to forget and keep weaving along. It's all a matter of time, patience and process. To wait and see. This is a lie. Or is it?